Getting rage off the road
Motorists will have to check their anger at the curb before putting their keys in the ignition if proposed legislation to crack down on road rage becomes law.The Legislature's Joint Transportation Committee is considering a bill to crack down on a range of bad behavior on the roads - from tailgating to unnecessary honking to making threats or obscene gestures.
I've got a brilliant idea: How about if we enforce the laws we already have? It's already illegal to tailgate. Last time I checked, obscene gestures fall into that pesky "freedom of speech" thing. And who, praytell, is going to determine if honking is necessary or unnecessary?
I'm sorry, but when you slam on your brakes, sit dead in the middle of the road for no apparent reason, and then make a random turn without a signal, you deserve a blast from the horn-o-density. That's necessary.
When you blow through a stop sign or red light and then putter along at 5-10 MPH below the speed limit, a blast on the tooter is mandatory.
When you sit at the green light for more than 5 seconds because you are more engrossed in your phone call than the flow of traffic, yeah, I'm blaring the horn.
If they really want to stop road rage, here's some handy hints from your ol' buddy Jay:
*Ticket people for blowing through red lights and stop signs.
*Pull people over on the highway for failing to keep right except to pass.
*Hand out tickets like breath mints for failing to signal a turn.
*Finish one road "improvement" project before starting a new one.
*Shoot on sight anyone passing a school bus with its lights on.
There. Hope that helps.
3 comments:
Blogger ate my comment!
Why should it be illegal to give someone a hint that they are driving like an idiot?
Another good one: pulling up to the railroad tracks (with stop sign)and stopping about six inches away from the tracks. Isn't the train wider than the tracks? Wouldn't they have better odds if they punched the gas and went fast?
Sigh..... stupid people with cars *and* cell phones, where to start..?
I would love to invent a "Cell Phone Zapper" complete with electric shock ;-}
How does one define "unnecessary honking" and how is that even in the same law as drag racing and running from the police.
OMG! Pleeeaaaassseee!
I think someone's cell phone has sucked out all of their brain cell.
I wish I could have some sort of rear looking device that would zap those asshats who zoom up so close to my rear end it looks like they are gettin' in my back seat. Just Tase the hell out of 'em!
And while we're inventing neat stuff, how about an auto lane ejector: a device that will boot your car out of the passing lane if you don't pass another car with in 3 minutes of entering that lane or if you fall 5 mph below the speed you were going when you entered that lane.
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