Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Three Wheel Turning...

(One million bonus points to whoever can ID the song parodied in that title - if anyone can get it, Countertop would be my guess...)


Exactly 15 days after I climbed out of a $1.7 million 1001-hp Bugatti Veyron 16.4 made in France, I climbed into a $7731 26-hp Wildfire WF650-C made in China. Our tech department had no trouble telling them apart. The one that produced 975 fewer horsepower also sported one fewer wheel.

The three-wheeled Wildfire is licensed as a motorcycle and is thus exempt from a lot of safety regs such as airbags and side-impact beams. It doesn’t have a lap belt, either, but it does include a shoulder belt and three features the Bugatti failed to offer: a cigarette lighter, an ashtray, and a pop-up skylight whose leading edge, oddly enough, performs the popping-up part. In that position, it scoops up all of the ventilation you’ll ever need, as well as all of the bees you’ll ever need, every last one of which has had its anger receptors presensitized by, first, a violent collision with Chinese glass and, second, a violent collision with your forehead.

{chortle}

Just in case you can't be bothered to click the link, here's what this... creation... looks like:
It's so ugly it's cute! Well, maybe not...
For $7500 I think I'll pass, though. There's a lot of really good used Civics, Corollas, and even Hyundai Accents for that kinda scratch. Especially when you consider that, since it's registered as a motorcycle, you would be required to wear a helmet in states with helmet laws. I think you could just about reach the very pinnacle of dorkhood that way: Wearing a helmet, driving a three-wheeled econobox made in China. It doesn't even have the cachet of a BMW Isetta...
That is all.

16 comments:

MedicMatthew said...

That is awesome!
I would totally buy one if I didn't live in a region that got more than 1/4 inch of snow every winter. Hell I'm pretty sure my lawnmower cranks out more horsepower than that thing.


BTW, finally able to take the course for my Maine concealed carry permit starting tomorrow!

JD said...

Song guess - John Hiatt's Slow Turning?

Home on the Range said...

My first thought was Proud Mary but no. . that's not it.

Grateful Dead?

The wheel is turning and you can't slow down,
You can't let go and you can't hold on,
You can't go back and you can't stand still,
If the thunder don't get you then the lightning will.

Jay G said...

MedicMatthew,

If it were more along the lines of $4K I would STRONGLY consider it as a commuter car - I work 15 miles away and it's all back roads, so the top speed's not an issue.

Plus I know people who could wring more power out... ;)

Great news on the permit front! I need to get my non-res. permit going...

JD,

Nope.

Brigid,

Nope and nope. Considerably... heavier.

The title is three words, and only varies by three letters total - one added, two changed...

Home on the Range said...

Tree Wheels Turning by Siren, M.C.A., Necros, & Basehead.

danno said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
danno said...

Lets try that again...

These look vaguely familiar, like the Scooters in Octopussy: http://screenmusings.org/Octopussy/pages/Oct_227.htm

Jay G said...

Brigid,

Nope. Not quite as esoteric. Think hard rock/heavy metal...

Anonymous said...

Wow. A van body on a Reliant Robin chassis.

Makes a warthog look cute. None for me, thanks.

Anonymous said...

Judas Priest, Free Wheel Burning.

Jay G said...

And Jimbob86 FTW!!!

Anonymous said...

It's probably loaded with lead and melamine...

AnarchAngel said...

I can't believe it took 14 comments to get there.

I should have read this earlier ;-)

Anonymous said...

Chris, Same-same.

I had ceased to buy JP by the point this one came out.... my musical tastes had changed- I was going to say broadened, but the first tapes (!) I bought were Abba's greatest hits, Kenny Rogers The Gambler, The Doors, and an Iron Maiden (don't remember which).... It don't get much broader than that w/o throwing in Michelle Jackson's Thriller, and my sister had that....

Jay G said...

Hey, I bought Metallica's Garage Band EP, Wagner's Ring Trilogy, and Public Enemy's Apocalype '91 at the same time, so I have a feel for eclectic tastes...

Anonymous said...

My bike has a bigger engine than that - and can go faster, all for 55-62 mpg. Think I'll stick to that (although in the rain and hail, that roof could come in handy).