Sunday, April 12, 2009

Good News!!!

Hostage captain rescued; Navy snipers kill 3 pirates
MANAMA, Bahrain (CNN) -- U.S. Navy snipers fatally shot three pirates holding an American cargo-ship captain hostage after seeing that one of the pirates "had an AK-47 leveled at the captain's back," a military official said Sunday.

The captain, who'd been held in a lifeboat in the Indian Ocean since Wednesday, was rescued uninjured, Navy Vice Adm. Bill Gortney told reporters.

Heh. You just know a story that has "Captain rescued, snipers kill pirates" in the freakin' title is going to be good...

Money Quote:
A senior defense official told CNN that each pirate was shot in the head.

[Pause to let bloodthirsty catcalls and cheers die down]

*sniff*

I just love a story with a happy ending. I'm all verklempt - talk amongst yourselves...

That is all.

11 comments:

jimbob86 said...

They've gone soft: the 4th pirate yet draws breath.

OrangeNeckInNY said...

3 less mutants sailing the oceans.

wolfwalker said...

Snipers on the ocean, killing with head shots from long range -- yeah, right!

Whatever actually happened, it ain't what that story says happened.

Ross said...

Verlkempt? There's something about an Italian trying to speak Yiddush...

Hey, Jay, does this up the goblin count? Or is that only for citizens who send goblins to discuss their shortcomings with their maker?

CW said...

Range was about 80-100 ft, which is not exactly long range for a long gun. The challenge would have been the relative movement between the fantail of the Bainbridge and the lifeboat and synchronizing the shots. Good shooting, in any event.

I understand the White House spin is that the Dear Leader's guidance was responsible.

Brad_in_MA said...

Jay,
Check in w/ Ross or me the next time you need to try your hand at using Yiddish in the American lexicon. You got it backwards. You're kvellin (beaming with joy) at the outcome.

- Brad

Jay G said...

jimbob86,

In all fairness, the fourth pirate was on board a US ship for "negotiations". Not bloody sporting to just ice him like that.

Besides. You always leave one alive to go back and report what he saw. I have a sneaking suspicion it was far more "up close and personal" than the official story line...

Heh.

OrangeNeckInNY,

Three for damn sure, and one that ought not to be out for, oh, the rest of his life.

A pity, isn't it, that 0bama closed Gitmo?

wolfwalker,

Yeah, I had pretty much the same thought. I can only hope that whatever really happened was witnessed by the remaining pirate, who will be released to spread the true tale of the wrath of the American soldier...

Ross,

Dead Goblin Count has always been private citizens, not police or military. As much as I'd like to count these three, I can't in all fairness to the DGC.

CW,

You noticed that, too? The leading headline has been that 0bama personally approved the mission - as though, with perfect 20/20 hindsight - there was ever a doubt that he would have dared oppose it?

C'mon...

Brad,

First off, it's irony - I'm all verklempt about those pore Pirate-Americans, so viciously denied their basic human rights by the jackbooted thugs of the Bushhitler regime.

Oh, wait. Paradigm shift. Now we're the guardians of the world once more...

It's also a riff from an old Mike Myers SNL skit...

Weer'd Beard said...

Three Pirates, Three Nostrils each!

Happy Weer'd Beard

jimbob86 said...

jimbob86,

In all fairness, the fourth pirate was on board a US ship for "negotiations". Not bloody sporting to just ice him like that.

JayG-

Sporting? This ain't a pheasant hunt. These are PIRATES. The Book of Hoyle does not apply. Put his head in a sack (of pigskin) and drop it on his house if you want to send a message.

-jimbob86

Jay G said...

Jimbob86, it was tongue-in-cheek...

:)

Personally, I'd have liked to have seen them grab the captain without any loss of life, then let the pirates go.

Then hit their departing craft with the largest torpedo possible while the CNN cameras roll..

jimbob86 said...

Your response was tongue in cheek..... mine ( Put his head in a sack (of pigskin) and drop it on his house) was not. We need to send a clear message: Don't screw with vessels flying the Stars and Stripes...... that used to be so well understood that during the reign of Ronaldus Maximus, OTHER countries (Kuwait, July 1987 for example) put US flags on their ships so they would not be screwed with. Witness how far we have fallen: nowadays, the Stars and Stripes = a kick me sign....