Tuesday, July 14, 2009

Overheard in the G. House...

So TheBoy has started watching Animal Planet. It's welcome break from Cartoon Network and Nickelodeon, so we indulge him from time to time. He especially likes the "Man-vs-nature" stories that they run from time to time - go figure, a young male likes stories about animals attacking people. Blood, guts, gore, etc. - everything a young boy needs...

He saw this one story about a woman who was attacked by a brown bear. She was hiking with her son in the woods when she was attacked. She yelled out that she was being attacked, and her son didn't believe her at first, because she was an inverterate practical joker. Obviously, once he came on the scene and saw her being attacked, he helped drive the bear off.


So TheBoy and I started talking about that. I'm known for playing the occasional practical joke (go figure), so he says,

"Daddy, that could happen to us! You could get attacked by a bear and I wouldn't believe you because you play jokes on me!"

I couldn't help it. Before I had a chance to censor myself, I replied,

"Buddy, you'd know if it were a joke or real. If it were a joke, you'd just hear Daddy talking."

[pause]

"If it were real, you'd hear [BANG][BANG][BANG][BANG][BANG][BANG] first"...




Even Mrs. G. laughed at that one...

That is all

5 comments:

Sigboy said...

Dont you normally carry your snubby? So wouldn't that be:
(Bang)(Bang)(Bang)(Bang)(Bang)(Click)

Reputo said...

So what sound does a speed loader make?

Jay G said...

Sigboy,

If I were going hiking in bear country, I'd be carrying the 629.

Either that or I copy&pasted once too many... ;)

Reputo,

Under the proscribed circumstances, I'd wager the sound would be something like "shitshitshitfuckshitshitshitFUCKshitshit"...

Sigboy said...

Those sounds aren't quite right until you imagine them with a Boston accent.

ZerCool said...

"Bahng!Bahng!Bahng!Bahng!Bahng!Bahng!"?

Just for the hell of it, you need to take him hiking sometime, get ahead, do a mag dump, and then start screaming. :D