Monday, October 5, 2009

Watch Your Language!

Alternate title: A brief history of grammatical and spelling errors that really grind Jay's gears...

There are many eternal questions out there. Glock vs. 1911. 9mm vs. .45 ACP. AR vs. AK. Is it "i" before "e" or "e" before "i"? Some of these are rhetorical; some are matters of opinion bordering on religion... But some questions need to be asked - like why do seemingly normal people completely and utterly forget the rules of spelling, punctuation, and/or grammar when composing e-mails, comments, or other electronic prose?

In that vein, here's a helpful lesson from Mr. Pain-in-the-ass Language Person:
  • They're/there/their. Three different words with different usages. They're not interchangeable; words have their meaning; and you'll look silly transposing them there.
  • Ditto your and you're. One is possessive, the other a contraction.
  • There is no "a" in definitely.
  • Nor in speech.
  • It's is a contraction of "It is". It is *not* the possessive form.
  • Teams don't loose games and I don't have any lose change.
  • It's "choose life", not chose.
  • We don't have arguements.
  • Please note: accommodate has two "c"s and two "m"s.
  • However occasion only has one "s".
  • There "*is* an "a" in aggravate (not aggrivate)
  • Who's that person? Is that the one whose car is red?
  • The coffee drink is "espresso" - there is no "x".
  • "Fourty" is not a number. Or even a real word.
  • Despite Chrysler dashboards to the contrary, those round things with the needles that measure your speed, gasoline levels, or battery are gauges, not gages.
  • There are two "c"s and two "r"s in "occurrence.
  • "Two" is a number. "Too" means "as well". "To" is a direction.
  • "Literally" means "it actually happened". If you literally laughed until you peed your pants, stand downwind from me...
  • It's "couldn't care less", not could.
  • The capitol of MA is Boston. The capital of Massachusetts is "M"... Oops. Washington DC houses the Capitol building. Thanks Christina!
  • Stationary means not moving, stationery is what you write on.
Okay. I think that's enough of my linguistic pet peeves for one sitting. If you recognize a handful of these in your own writing (and I constantly screw up occasion and accommodate!), no need to fret. Someone wiseass will be along to point out your typographical, grammatical, or spelling error shortly...

That oughta set things straight on a Monday...


That is all.

22 comments:

The Big Guy said...

Insure/Ensure and their cousin Assure... And Illusion/Allusion.

Misuse of those terms really chap my ass too.

My take on the subject-
http://l2uj.blogspot.com/2008/09/spelling-and-grammar.html

TBG

Patrick said...

I remember passing a "Stationary Store" once. I was glad to see the store wasn't going anywhere.

ASM826 said...

Of course it borders on religion. Glock vs. 1911? That's not a question.

Glocks are tools, designed to throw bullets. They work well, and if you need a bullet thrower, there are far worse choices.

1911's were brought down from on high by John Moses Browning (PBUH). A work of love and craftsmanship, at their best they are a joy to hold, to display, to carry. A handgun with a history, carried by the U.S. military for almost a century.

The statue on Parris Island of Iron Mike holds a 1911 high. The 1911 is a combat handgun held in such regard that the Marine Corps just opened a contract to order new frames this year. Owning one is a privilege, shooting one is a pleasure. It is a connection to a century of history, a sacramental act that connects you to millions of other 1911 shooters, men like these:
http://www.sightm1911.com/1911%20Myth.htm

Not that I have any strong feelings about this.

wolfwalker said...

Ancestors are them as came before you in your family tree. Descendants are those that come after you. Everybody's got ancestors. If you got no kids, you got no descendants.

I've even seen newspaper reporters use "ancestors" when they meant "descendants." Drives me up the wall.

Anonymous said...

Sweet Deity, yes. Thank you. I thought I was the only person that had a problem with this.

My favorites? Yes, I have a few, thanks for asking! ;-)

A web page can also be known as a "site". The things on top of your firearm are "sights". Please note... they are not the same thing. Also, things that you can see are along your "line of sight". Very closely related to the sights mentioned earlier. "Line of site" means nothing, unless you're talking about a linear arrangement of geographic landmarks.
Please, people. If you passed fourth grade somewhere along the way, you should know this stuff. If you didn't, I'll cut you some slack.

breda said...

definately/definitely

Brad_in_MA said...

Jay,

I've got two additions -- and they both fall into the singular/plural realm of confusion . . .

1) Less used incorrectly in place of fewer.

2) Using "data" as a singluar. The word data "data" is plural --
"datum" is singular

"The data ARE correct" is proper usage.

Saying "The data is correct" is wrong, no matter what.

And what kills me is the number of times folks in the IT world get this wrong. Drives me bat-shit fooking crazy - not unlike fingernails down a chalk board. {shudders}

-- Brad

Brad_in_MA said...

Anon,

Don't forget "cite" -- to reference another's work. The World's Most Dangerous Librarian (aka Breda) should know this one.

- Brad

PeterT said...

Ah, Brad_in_MA beat me to it. sight, site, cite

PeterT

RW said...

Addition:

Pluralizing proper nouns does not necessitate an apostrophe. Barack & Michelle are the Obamas, not the Obama's.

I can't tell you the number of holiday cards that I get where families wish me a Merry Christmas & they do that. I caught my own wife doing it one year!

The defintely (no A) thing must be the most popular, though, IMO.

zeeke42 said...

A role is a part to play, a roll is a thing you eat.

Anonymous said...

I saw a bumper sticker recently that read, "It's okay not to drink." Someone tell AA it is okay to not drink.

Recently it is popular to offer a product or service "for" free. there is no "for" in free. "For" indicates an exchange.

Bruce said...

"That's a whole nother matter."

AAAAGH!!!!

Hunter said...

Somewhere, Misters Safire, Kirkpatrick, and Buckley are raising a toast to a potentially viable wordsmith of astonishing degree.

McThag said...

"I could care less," is valid. It's saying that it's not worth the effort to give less of a shit. Midwestern debasement of "couldn't care less" and it's in common usage there. Never forget that there's regional variation in slang.

GM thinks they are gages in their service manuals as well; also Apple's spellchecker thinks that gages is spelled correctly. Grrrrrrrrrr.

Anonymous said...

The first and second bullet points drive me absolutely nuts, because people get them wrong all the time.

Especially when businesses do it. That fries my bacon.

Anonymous said...

Don't forget Discrete/Discreet and Principle/Principal.

Discrete: separate, distinct.
Discreet: subtle, avoiding attention.

Principle: rule, method, or guideline.
Principal: primary, first.

Those ones drive me up a wall.

Newbius said...

Lose and loose...

You will tend to lose loose items...

Sight, Site, and Cite.

I cannot cite how many times I have seen (using my power of sight) these juxtaposed in one location (site). Sigh.

And everybody forgets the third word in the "Y" trio: yore. "You're correct in your usage, in your column of yore. :)

Pax,

Newbius

WV: "Doper", as in one who uses dope or drugs. Or, alternately, one who finishes the fabric covering on an airplane's wing.

WW Paul said...

I agree with many of these.

As for the mistakes I continue to make, the rest of you should lighten up.

Ed Miller said...

In principle, the principal is your pal.

- pupista! (barking mad on the right)

Christina RN LMT said...

One nit-pick...

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/capital

It *is* the capital city. AND capital letter.

Capitol is where the state legislature meets.

http://dictionary.reference.com/browse/capitol

Otherwise, EXCELLENT! You've touched on all of my written pet peeves. One of my verbal ones is "supposably". ARGH.

Bruce B. said...

"Someone wiseass will be along to point out your typographical..."

Ok, I'll be that some wiseass :-)