Words of wisdom...Have You Ever Danced?
An old prospector shuffled into town leading an old tired mule. The old man headed straight for the only saloon to clear his parched throat. He walked up and tied his old mule to the hitch rail. As he stood there, brushing some of the dust from his face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.The young gunslinger looked at the old man and laughed, saying, "Hey old man, have you ever danced?"
The old man looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No, I never did dance... never really wanted to."
A crowd had gathered as the gunslinger grinned and said, "Well, you old fool, you're gonna dance now," and started shooting at the old man's feet. The old prospector --not wanting to get a toe blown off-- started hopping around like a flea on a hot skillet. Everybody was laughing, fit to be tied. When his last bullet had been fired, the young gunslinger, still laughing, holstered his gun and turned around to go back into the saloon.
The old man turned to his pack mule, pulled out a double-barreled shotgun, and cocked both hammers. The loud clicks carried clearly through the desert air. The crowd stopped laughing immediately. The young gunslinger heard the sounds too, and he turned around very slowly. The silence was almost deafening. The crowd watched as the young gunman stared at the old timer and the large gaping holes of those twin barrels.
The barrels of the shotgun never wavered in the old man's hands, as he quietly said, "Son, have you ever licked a mule's butt?"The gunslinger swallowed hard and said, "No sir..... but... I've always wanted to."
There are a few lessons for us all here:
- Never be arrogant.
- Don't waste ammunition.
- Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
- Always, always make sure you know who has the power.
- Don't mess with old men, they didn't get old by being stupid.
That is all.
10 comments:
There are a few lessons for us all here:
Never be arrogant.
Don't waste ammunition.
Whiskey makes you think you're smarter than you are.
Always, always make sure you know who has the power.
Don't mess with old men, they didn't get old by being stupid.
And also - karma is a BITCH. ;-)
Absolutely brilliant!
tweaker
Old age and treachery will beat youth and enthusiasm ANY day of the week!
Also, don't bring a revolver to a shotgun fight!
The thing about us old guys, is that we are too old to scrap or get hurt, so we cheat every chance we get.
5. Never scare an old man. He won't fight you, he'll just kill you.
sv
Thanks, glad you liked it :-)
Heh. Reminds me of the WWII vet we delivered furniture to many moons ago. He had a European theater map up on one wall, and a Garand and carbine up on another. (He also showed us a flawless bring-back Luger, the memory of which I still drool over.)
As we were leaving, my co-worker opined that he was a doddering old man who was "living in the past", did I think those guns would really work, and didn't I think he was a little past the age where he ought to have guns?
People's attitudes and ignorance sometimes leave me at a loss for words. OTOH, I hope certain people will regard me as addled and incompetent...perhaps they already do.
Anonymous story reminds me of a story I heard once.
A 70+ year old grandfather was walking in the park(I believe it was in new york, but I forget the park name), with his young granddaughter, a mugger comes up and tells him to give him his wallet. The old man starts handing the wallet over and then suddenly breaks the mugger's neck. Turns out the old man was former SS, he claimed it was a reflex(!)
Heh. I heard Jerry Clower do this once... not sure if it's originally his, or if he just covered it. His best routine, however, has to be "Tellin' Time."
MMMmmmmnnn!
Mule butt, ask for it by name!
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