Parents keep child's gender secret
“So it’s a boy, right?” a neighbour calls out as Kathy Witterick walks by, her four month old baby, Storm, strapped to her chest in a carrier.The parents are deliberately hiding the gender of their baby in an attempt to prevent gender stereotyping. Good luck on that. When TheBoy was 2 years old, we bought him a little doll so he would get used to the idea of having a little sister. First thing he did with it was to pick it up by the head, point it at the wall, and yell "BANG! BANG!" We've never pushed either gender stereotype, buying trucks for Baby Girl G. when she's asked and stuffed animals for TheBoy when he's asked.Each week the woman asks the same question about the baby with the squishy cheeks and feathery blond hair.
You know what, though? By and large, they both prefer traditionally gender-stereotypical toys, clothes, and colors. TheBoy plays with trucks and toy guns. BabyGirl G. plays with ponies and dolls. TheBoy wears blues and grays; BabyGirl G. loves pink and purple. BabyGirl G. has her hair long and wears dresses; TheBoy likes a buzzcut and shorts. We have never pushed either child to chose either way; they have chosen on their own.
These folks, quite simply, have bought wholeheartedly into the "nurture" end of the "nature vs. nurture" argument. They're shrugging off the biological, genetic, and biochemical aspects of development in their own twisted version of operant conditioning: "If we pretend hard enough that gender can be ignored then it won't matter!" Biology is immaterial, they claim; all that matters are that you prevent your girls from wearing pink and let your boys braid their hair. Hogwash; I suspect that deep down they know it - but it gets them ink, doesn't it?
Because otherwise, really, what's the difference between these people and the "pray away the gay" morons?
That is all.
9 comments:
A family friend had a similar experience to TheBoy's doll... their daughter one day wanted some toy trucks. So, they got her some. Later, the dad saw her playing with them, and he asked her about her trucks. The daughter replied, "this is the daddy truck, here's the mommy truck, and these are the baby trucks..."
They seem to have forgotten the proper way to handle Gender Stereotyping: "Pink is for Girls, Blue is for Assholes!" (from The Rocky Horror School of Child Rearing).
If you read the whole article, those particular parents are big time revolutionary leftists... They spent time living with the Zaptistas and in Cuba so they could learn about the revolution...
Chris, understood. Hence my comment about them wanting more ink.
Personally, I find it reprehensible that they're using their children as their own little social experiment.
With any kind of luck, these kids will rebel against mom & dad and grow up to become Reaganite Republicans...
man, you're smart with your kids. it took me FOREVER to beg and plead for a toy car, then they'd almost never let me play with it. i pretended to like Barbies merely so i could convince my parents that i needed the Barbie Corvette.
hated pinks and purples, too - always preferred blues and greens. the concept of being "pretty" didn't hit 'till i was maybe 11. maybe i'm just weird.
I was sitting in a circle with a bunch of 14 year old female volleyball players a few years ago, chatting while they stretched after practice. I happened to ask them what is your favorite color?
Around the circle I got an expected range of answers of light blue, neon green, several purples, yellow, etc. until I got to the last girl - this young athlete was always all business - tough, determined, strong, fast, hard as nails. Our local high school football team would be shoe-in state champions if they could manage to play with half this girl's aggressive, hard hitting, take no prisoners attitude.
She looked at me and scowled. I asked her what is your favorite color. The scowl deepened. I asked again. The scowl grew dark, really dark, scary dark. Being a guy, I ignored the obvious warning signs of danger and asked again.
Finally through clenched teeth - with a viciousness that made the little hairs on the back of my neck stand up, she leaned towards me and growled - "Pink!"
You do realize that as late as 1931 that Pink was for boys and blue for girls? Also, the colors can vary by country even today.
Don't mean anything by it, just saying that the "typical" gender colors, seem to have changed not to long ago (in the scheme of things).
I only asked for one doll - so I could get the horse she came with. Always asked for farm equipment and wore blue jeans when I was able to make my own decisions what to wear (God, I hated playing soccer at recess in a dress when I was younger).
Anyway, just cause they don't ask, doesn't mean that they don't want something - there's lots of things I didn't ask for because it would have seemed odd to my friends or family.
Not saying that the gender should be hidden though.
They are doing wonders for the "Dirty Hippie" stereotypes.
Just sayin'
Daughter inherited from older brother, a dump truck with a push handle. She promptly put her doll in it and pushed her around. We stopped worrying about gender stereotypes.
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