WTF Vignettes...

From the BLNN:

Florida man seeks to wed his Apple computer

Chris Sevier, however, insists that this lawsuit needs his intervention on behalf of "other minority sexual orientation groups." He equates his thought process to gay couples having "the right to marry their object of sexual desire, even if they lack corresponding sexual parts."

As the Broward New Times reports, Sevier believes he should have the right to marry his "preferred sexual object." And that would be his "porn-filled Apple computer."

Um, yeah. About that... In a perfect world, the judge would have had this jackoff escorted from the courtroom, and then instructed the bailiff to give him a throat punch as a going-away present...

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House plant is heir to $5,000

Remember when New York hotel owner Leona Helmsley left her Maltese dog a mind-boggling $12 million in her estate? Back in 2007, when Helmsley died, her doggie-heir was seen as an eccentric sign of the ridiculous excess of the super-wealthy.

But that was then. Leaving money for the care of pets after an owner's death doesn't raises eyebrows so much anymore. But what about leaving money for the care of a house plant? The Wall Street Journal reports that a Pittsburgh woman plans to bequeath $5,000 in her will to a friend for the care of a 7-foot-tall, 42-year-old philodendron.

I was following along until they got to philodendrons. Forget that crap, man, those plants are evil...

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Vandals Flip Over Smart Cars in San Francisco

Someone's been vandalizing compact Smart cars in San Francisco, flipping the tiny vehicles on their front and rear ends in the city's streets.

NBC Bay Area found four of the targeted Smart cars between Sunday night and Monday morning. Two were found in the Bernal Heights neighborhood on Anderson Street, and another was found a bit south on Sweeny and Bowdoin streets, closer to the Portola district. They were either sitting on their headlights, rear bumpers high in the air, or vice versa.

I guess this is the urban hipster version of cow tipping. I think this is what happens when you have teeny cars and people who are bored. What I don't get is how on earth it took 6 people to flip one. A friend and I used to move the Toyota of a mutual friend around the parking lot at work by lifting the rear end off the ground (deactivating the e-brake) and carrying it.

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I think that's enough stupid for one day...

That is all.