I'd wager a good number of the parents out there already know where this is going from the title alone...
We're doing back-to-school shopping and planning this weekend. It's pouring out, so going to the beach one last time, riding our bikes, etc. are out; so we're figuring it's a good time to make sure that we have everything in place before the madness of the school year starts in full tilt.
Mrs. G. had last week off, and took the kids shopping for school supplies. As she brought them from aisle to aisle looking at assorted character notebooks, colored pencils, and other assorted stationery and writing implements, she was informed by TheBoy that he didn't want anything with a logo because it was, and I quote, "too babyish" (I actually asked him to repeat this so I'd get it right).
*Sigh* I knew this was coming...
He's starting third grade in three days. He's playing in a traveling soccer league. Character pencils are "too babyish" for him. My little boy is growing up, rushing headlong towards tweenhood and then - {gasp} - the dreaded teen years. [Insert common parental refrain about how it was "just yesterday" that we brought him home from the hospital, yadda yadda yadda, cat's in the cradle, etc.] Who are you, and what have you done with the precious little boy who used to pirouette around the house saying "I'm a princess!"?
Side note1: I have a hypothesis about the "no scorekeeping" sports. I don't think it's to protect the kids - they know who won and who lost - I think it's to protect the parents. Keeping score means that your precious snowflake might be on the losing team, so in order to prevent all-out melees at the T-ball field, we claim to not keep score for the kids, when in reality it's the overzealous parents...
Side note2: I actually can't wait for my son to be a surly teen who sleeps until noon on the weekends. I have eager plans to come into his room with Mr. Whistle and get him out of bed at 7 AM to help me with the yardwork. I always thought my dad was being a sadistic bastard when he would do this to me; now that I've become a parent I know the real reason: payback. It's payback for years and years of having a small person come flying into your room, jump up and down on your chest, and ask (at top volume) DADDY, CAN I WATCH TV? at 5:30 in the morning...
Ah, parenthood. Keeping Jack Daniels and Pfizer in business for decades...
That is all.
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..."DADDY, CAN I WATCH TV?"... I find it absolutely amazing how much noise can come out of such little bodies.
Ah, parenthood. Keeping Jack Daniels and Pfizer in business for decades...
I think that the proper name of the cocktail is "Jack and Zac" (Prozac).
It's what I've heard, anyway.
Side Note 1. Yes. My son kept score in T Ball, even though there was none. At least not officially. He's a fierce competitor to this day. Made of win.
Side Note 2. Good luck.
They really do grow up very quickly, so enjoy the trip.
BTW, did I mention that I'll be a grandfather before the end of the year? How the hell did that happen?
Jay - new to your blog but this post completely speaks to me man!
My oldest is starting Kindergarten in two days...
"Who are you, and what have you done with the precious little boy who used to pirouette around the house saying "I'm a princess!"?"
He's growing up, Jay. He had to stop emulating Daddy sooner or later. *grin*
Queen. I'm a queen, dammit.
Jay, I was chatting with one of the other parents on the first day of school Monday and she told me how last year her son had looked at my (oldest) daughter, then turned to her and said "Mommy, she's beautiful."
Aw hell, it's starting already...!
My three know better than to wake me up on weekends, though. They know the rule is to go play quietly til Mommy surfaces. Of course, it never actually works out like that, but hey at least they know the theory!
Just wait till you tell him to go do something and he pipes back "NO!" with a pissy look on his face.
My 10 year old did that yesterday when asked to empty the dishwasher. After about 10 minutes of him mouthing off to his mom, I had enough. Lets just say that he didnt enjoy being dragged through the house by his scalp.
FYI,
Read this one to the wife. She loved it. :)
Your kid(s) come running in and jump on your chest? Man, what I would have given to have kids that aimed that high. Even if they would have raised their POA by just enough to target my belly button I'd have bestowed gifts untold on them.
My other they're-growing-up-too-fast story is from when my oldest was 5 years old (the age is important) and we had just watched Crocodile Dundee a few days before. I caught her in her one piece bathing suit admiring her own behind in a full length mirror with the back side of the suit pulled fully into her crack ala thong style. When caught, she quickly pulled it back out and acted all innocent. She finally relented that she was copying the swimsuit the actress wore in the movie because it made her "prettier".
Those were the most terrifying words I had ever heard.
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