Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Erin Go Braless!*

For our Irish friends out there:

Mora na maidine dhuit

Happy Saint Patrick's Day everyone. Even those ridiculous hacks in Boston with the day off for {giggle} Evacuation Day (why do they call it Evacuation Day? Because after fifteen green beers you're evacuating all over the sidewalk).

Kiss someone who's Irish if you're into that sort of thing - I've got three choices today!

That is all.

*Sorry, I'm Italian. I'm new at this whole Irish thing...

5 comments:

PISSED said...

Thanks for the well wishes Jay..Thanks to the high speed internets.. the pron is faster and after going to teh Bah later, ill probably go home and wax me shillelagh!!

Happy St Patrick's Day :)

PISSED said...

Shayne had been drinking at his local pub all day and most of the
night.

Mick, the bartender says, "You'll not be drinking anymore tonight,
Shayne".

Shayne replies "OK Mick, I'll be on my way then." Shayne spins around
on his stool and steps off. He falls flat on his face. "Shite" he
says and pulls himself up by the stool and dusts himself off.

He takes a step towards the door and falls flat on his face. He looks
to the doorway and thinks to himself that if he can just get to the
door and get some fresh air he'll be fine. He belly crawls to the door
and shimmies up the doorframe. He sticks his head outside and takes a
deep breath of fresh air, feels much better and takes a step out onto
the sidewalk.

He falls flat on his face.

"I'm fockin' focked," he says. He can see his house just a few doors
down,and crawls to the door and shimmies up the doorframe, opens the
door and shimmies inside. He takes a look up the stairs and says "No
fockin' way".

He crawls up the stairs to his bedroom door and says "I can make it
to the bed." He takes a step into the room and falls flat on his face.

He says "Fock it" and falls into bed.

The next morning, his wife, Mary, comes into the room carrying a cup
of coffee and says, "Get up Shayne. Did you have a bit to drink last
night?".

Shayne says, "I did Mary. I was fockin' p!ssed. But how'd you know?"

"Mick called. You left your wheelchair at the pub again!"

Stretch said...

What do you call a Jewish Elf?
A Lepra-cohan.

KBCraig said...

Over 260 years since my ancestors landed on these shores, and I have to say: "Kiss me, I'm Irish? Fook off, I"m Scottish!"

Jay G said...

An Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walked into a pub. They each bought a pint. Three flies landed in each of their pints.

The Englishman pushed his beer away in disgust.

The Scotsman fished the fly out of his beer, and continued drinking it, as if nothing had happened.

The Irishman picked the fly out of his drink, held it out over the beer, and said 'spit it out, you bastard'.