The Big Guy is trying to wrestle the title of "He who sends me the most stuff that makes me scratch my head" away from
PISSED. He sends this delightful story of WHAT THE HELL:
SI girl kidnaps toddler for revenge in Hot Pocket incidentA teenager angry at being smacked by her Staten Island lover on Valentine's Day for eating his last microwaveable munchie sought revenge by kidnapping the man's 3-year-old daughter, law enforcement sources said.
Aliyah Austin, 16, swiped the little girl from her Mariners Harbor home on Tuesday at about 7 p.m., four hours after the 29-year-old man had left for work, the sources said.
1. Man hitting woman. FAIL.
2. 16 year old girl, 29 year old dude? FAIL.
3. Over a Hot Pocket. FAIL.
This story will stand as Exhibit A the next time some ivory tower pinhead starts pontificating about how NY is so much more enlightened than [insert southern state here]...
That is all.
9 comments:
4. Kidnapping 3yr old child. FAIL
OK, you missed the funniest part of the story. Talk about comedy gold:
"If you want your baby back, meet me at the rock," Austin allegedly threatened the father through text messages.
She also taunted him with Facebook messages, before de-friending him, sources said.
O.
M.
G.
She de-friended him?
That's just inhumane!!!
I...
What?
Toss them both in a pit, with axes. Leave the winner in the hole and fill it back in.
Alternatively: Tie them both to posts. Give the mother a blow-gun and plenty of salt-encrusted darts...
Grace Metalious would be proud.
Pretty swanky neighborhood, too. Where, I'm sure, the residents can't picture something like this happening outside of a trailer park south of the M-D line.
Yet another example that you can't buy yourself out from being stupid.
Thank goodness one commenter at the noozepaper expressed some concern about the child-watching arrrangements - or more accurately the apparent lack of same.
The arguments over daddy being a pedophile or not were just added LOL.
stay safe.
wv=asinky. The feeling I got reading about this pair.
This VERY EXACT same thing happened to me.
Except for all of the details.
I mean I ate a hot pocket once.
Staten ISLAND, Manhattan ISLAND, Long ISLAND ...
The solution is obvious.
Reminds me of the old "what's wrong with this picture" puzzles. (What's RIGHT with this picture?!?)
I feel for the three-year-old. None of this is her fault, but she's going to have to pay for it all.
Just for fun, I'm going to imagine some aspect of this going to court... before Judge Judy or someone like her. The verbal pyrotechnics would be amusing.
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