"A" For Effort...

Veeshir sends in this story of a Goblin who tried to add himself to the DGC...

Ohio State Students Return to Find Body in Off-Campus Apartment

Police say some Ohio State University seniors found the body of a suspected burglar and a lot of blood when they returned to their off-campus apartment from a Labor Day weekend away.

Columbus police Sgt. Steven Little tells The Columbus Dispatch investigators believe the man broke a window to enter the apartment and severed an artery on his arm in the process.

*facepalms*

Darwin will not be denied, folks. If you're going to break in using the tried-and-true method of busting out a window, for the love of Pete don't use your damn bare arm. I mean, really. I feel bad for these poor kids, though - they come back from the long weekend to find blood everywhere, a busted window, and a goblin corpse on the floor. That's pretty much a trifecta of fail.

If there's a bright side, it's that no one was home at the time of the break-in. Imagine that scene! You hear the window breaking, you go to investigate, and there's some homeless dude bleeding out in your kitchen. It'd be a tough call whether you call the paramedics or film it for Bumfights... (kidding). Seriously, that's gotta be a nasty shock to come face to face with death like that, and I hope it doesn't haunt those kids.

On the other hand, one less goblin, just not one for the count...

That is all.