Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Pre-Emptive Strike...

You might want to gouge out your eyes now, before the story that Brad_in_MA sent in takes hold...

PETA Plans Porn Website to Promote Message

NORFOLK, Va.—People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals is planning to launch a pornographic website to promote its animal-rights and vegan-diet message, a move that critics say will backfire.

PETA spokeswoman Lindsay Rajt said in a telephone interview from Los Angeles on Tuesday that the group has applied with ICM Registry to launch the website peta.xxx.

Okay, where to start? I mean, first off, just the whole idea of "porn" and "PETA" in the same article is so full of WRONG and FAIL that it's in danger, as Borepatch says, of collapsing in on itself in a black hole of FAIL. This is like the Brady Campaign announcing that they will be offering a new line of shampoo with e Brady name on them - the two items have nothing to do with each other.

Only in this case, the natural connotation between an (alleged) animal rights group and pornography makes you wonder if anyone thought this through? Will there be an expectation of certain types of pr0n? Will Mr. Hands make another appearance? And if so, will he be treated humanely? The jokes just write themselves, but none are bigger than the joke that PETA itself has become.

And lastly, given that they're all vegetarians, obviously there will be no oral...

That is all.

17 comments:

bluesun said...

Sounds like something that would be popular on Vicious Circle...

Bubblehead Les. said...

Porn Stars have been "doing" PSA's with PETA for years. PETA is just "going all the way", and "making it" full time.

John said...

Your closing comment (italicized) is priceless. Good thing I wasn't ingesting anything at the moment.

SpeakerTweaker said...

What John said.

Wonder, though. What kind of vegetarians we're talking about? You know...

No, on second thought, there's no way that can end well.

;)



tweaker

w/v: weeps. I kid you not. How apropos.

ExurbanKevin said...

Actually, it makes a lot of sense, if we assume that porn is about the degradation of the human body (and there are smart people on either side of this argument, so let's leave this one lie for now).

PETA is all about degrading the human condition in favour of animals. Humans are not on top of the food chain in their world, therefore the human body is nothing special or wonderful, but just another tool to be used for their cause.

Weer'd Beard said...

Moneyshot is an animal product...I'm just sayin'

Future dialog line: "Did somebody order a Soy Dog?"

And of course there's the inhumanity of eating clams!

North said...

"Good thing I wasn't ingesting anything at the moment."

Spitting it out is an option.

North said...

Porn stars that don't eat meat?

Borepatch said...

Heh

How about "Meat porn"? Mmmmm, bacon bleu burger!

Ross said...

One wonders if they'll have any bestiality on their porn site. I'm sure that they'd do it ethically, of course!

Veeshir said...

I wonder if they'll shave.

Not enough to check, just enough for idle curiosity.

North said...

The womem? Their hoohaws? I doubt they even do their pits.

Weer'd Beard said...

Ok North, you convinced me! ;]

Unknown said...

I'm glad PETA's dumb enough to do it! Maybe it'll finish 'em off.

Veeshir said...

Yeah, I was talking pits and legs, I hadn't even thought about their hoo-has.

Now I have to go look for pics of Helen Thomas nekkid to get the taste of that out of my head.

greg said...

Is it going to be free, or subscription? I know Hayden Panettiere is a big PETA fan, and when they stage their Naked stunts, like in front of a Spokane Sushi restaurant today, the female member of the group was fairly comely...

Charles Lee Scudder said...

Thanks I need brain bleach now.