Sunday, May 23, 2010

Happy News Story of the Day

Key Al Qaeda Figure Accidentally Blows Himself Up, U.S. Officials Say

A man whom the U.S. described as a key figure in Al Qaeda in the Arabian Peninsula accidentally blew himself up, U.S. military officials told Fox News.

The officials say Nayif Al-Qahtani was "messing with a bomb" when it went off. U.S. officials had been watching him, but Fox News' sources insist the U.S. had nothing to do with his death.

"Messing with a bomb". How much you wanna bet he asked someone to hold his beer first?

I liked this statement:
Al-Qahtani was "a vibrant guy linked to ongoing operations planning, and his death will have an impact," one official told Fox News.
What the hell was this guy, the conference coordinator? From the description given to the media it sounds likes something HR would release if an employee were to meet a grisly end in a freak paper shredder accident. It's treated like an unfortunate accident from an otherwise normal workplace scenario, which I guess in their twisted worldview is exactly what it is. At least Al-Qahtani didn't get a chance to ply his wicked craft among US troops or civilians.

Besides, it's always nice to see some terrorist asshole get exactly what they deserve.

That is all.

Story e-mailed to me by good friend, reader, and blogshoot attendee brad_in_ma, who forwarded it to me with this disclaimer:
I laughed. Out. Loud.

11 comments:

West, By God said...

Erm, not to pick nits, but the article said Arabian Peninsula. Not many Afghanis around...

Jay G said...

Oops! Duly noted and corrected. Thank'ee kind sir.

Anonymous said...

Vibrant?
WTF is vibrant to a murderous terrorist?
Vibrant?
Oops SUnday and I kainda almost swore there!!
Oh pigcrap....

Anonymous said...

Vibrant?
WTF is vibrant to a murderous terrorist?
Vibrant?
Oops SUnday and I kainda almost swore there!!
Oh pigcrap....

Home on the Range said...

Hope the Darwin Awards has even more of this category this coming year.

Brad_in_IL said...

Jay,

I think the conversation went more like this . . .

Hey Abdul, hold my goat-milk and watch THIS !!

W.V. -- undedu (undead-u)

- Brad

Anonymous said...

Terroristic bomb-making - one of the few fields wherein "on-the-job training" takes on an impressive amount of Darwinian influence...

Scott McCray said...

Love it - made my morning.

- Scott

jimbob86 said...

Years ago, I read a book ("Vengeance", IIRC, they made the movie "Munich" out of it) about the Israeli assasins who were targeting Palestinian terrorists in Europe.... there was a line in there that "terrorists accidentally blow them selves up with boring regularity", but their PR mouthpieces don't make calls to "claim responsibilitiy" for such failures ....

wv- "tortfun" recreational litigation?

Jake (formerly Riposte3) said...

Well, see, he just wanted to make sure it worked, that's all.

TOTWTYTR said...

Other accounts say that he was killed in a shoot out with Yemeni (or Saudi) security forces, or maybe killed in an air strike. It's also curious that his demise came about a week after the US put him on a terror watch list.

I wonder; If they screw up do they get their virgins or do they get a date with Helen Thomas?