Is People. Is Stupid.

A couple quick stories just to show you the oppressive wall of stupid out there...

Man allegedly draws gun on neighbor for passing gas

TEANECK, NJ – A New Jersey man has been charged with assault after allegedly drawing a gun on his neighbor for passing gas outside his apartment.

MyFoxNY reports 72-year-old Daniel Collins Jr. was arrested after allegedly pointing a .32-caliber Taurus revolver at his neighbor after the man passed gas outside his door. The neighbors reportedly are involved in a dispute over noise.

Because, you know, someone farting outside your door is worth threatening their life over, right? Now, the guy was charged with some fairly serious crimes - felonies, even - over a noise dispute. Now, the dude's 72 years old and getting into disputes with his neighbors over farting - not to make light, but something tells me this isn't the first time he'll go to jail.

And next time, maybe his neighbor will up the ante and bring a lighter for his next gas attack...

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Man charged with assault with dangerous weapon after allegedly throwing fries at stepdaughter

LOWELL, Mass. – A Massachusetts man is facing charges of assault with a dangerous weapon after he allegedly threw hot french fries into his stepdaughter's face.

CBS Boston reports 26-year-old James Hackett was leaving a McDonalds in Lowell when he began arguing with his wife, the girl's mother. Police say when the young girl chimed in, Hackett threw the fries in her face. The girl was not seriously hurt.

This one, at first, pegged the WTF-o-meter - charged with assault with a dangerous weapon over french fries? But the more I thought about it, the more it made sense - it's not a *deadly* weapon (there is a legal distinction between dangerous and deadly - and a shod foot is considered a deadly weapon) - it's a valid charge for indicating battery where a foreign object was used.

Now, the "mindset" of someone that would assault a child over an argument with the child's parent? That's something completely different. This is one of those murky areas for me as a parent - I don't tolerate people abusing children in my presence well. I can completely understand someone calling the cops over something like this - while french fries might not seem like much, who knows how much further Captain Hothead will take things?

I mean, he might force the girl to actually *eat* those fries, which is a crime punishable by death in Massachusetts...

That is all.

*Two* dispatches from...

(image courtesy of Robb Allen)